Very first day of work, ripped my suit on the door handle, other suits were at the dry cleaning, had to rock the ripped suit to work like a Muppet
"The less you touch your mouse the more you sleep"
Spent a week and a half working a book, didn't even open it, call lasted 15 minutes
"Maybe one day we'll all be assholes who don't realize it too"
"No, go fuck yourself, we don't need to tell ECM a story, just send them an excel output"
In HF interview — “I know you think you work Sundays, maybe 6 or so hours. Here we work 6 days a week. Sunday is a Tuesday. If you’re looking for something a bit less intense, this isn’t it”
In HF interview — “you have an online presence I see, is that something you plan to continue to have? Well if you work here you can’t. We want our employees to be focused on our funds mission”
"If you don't come in on Saturday, don't bother coming in on Sunday"
Spent an hour flipping through every font in PPT trying to recreate a logo when we would be getting it the next morning anyways